The Ministry of Defence has officially classified the Friday evening "booking out" window as a category five natural disaster.

Thousands of sweat-drenched recruits were seen bursting through camp gates with the frantic, unhinged energy of a pack of rabid hyenas.

The intoxicating scent of high-grade starch and industrial-strength body odour created a biological hazard zone extending three kilometres from Pasir Ris Interchange.

"Eh, move lah cb, my ferry reach already, you block me for what, I want go home and sleep until I die," screamed Recruit Koh while using his field pack as a battering ram against a group of elderly commuters.

Public transport officials have advised civilians to avoid any man wearing a green pixelated uniform, as their capacity for basic human empathy is temporarily replaced by a desperate need for oily fried chicken.

"Walao, these boys like siao lang, once they see the gate open, they lari like the floor is made of extra guard duty," noted a traumatised bus captain.

"Lanjiao, you think my sergeant is scary? Try staying in Tekong one more minute, I will steamroll everyone in this bus just to smell my own bed," muttered a trembling Private Lee.

MINDEF reminds the public that any recruit moving at Mach 1 is legally considered a kinetic weapon and should not be engaged under any circumstances.