In a bold move to ensure no citizen ever experiences true silence again, the Ministry of Leisure has converted every square inch of remaining pavement into "High-Intensity Lepak" pickleball courts.

Officials claim the deafening pop of plastic hitting paddles is the only way to prevent Singaporeans from thinking too hard about their dwindling bank accounts.

The initiative aims to transform passive relaxation into a mandatory cardiovascular nightmare for anyone over the age of sixty.

"Aiyah, I just want to sit and look at bird only, then suddenly one uncle smash the ball into my face," complained local resident Ah Hock.

"Now everywhere also court, cannot even walk to market without kena hit by plastic ball, damn sianz."

Experts suggest the constant movement helps citizens ignore the rising cost of living by focusing entirely on not tearing a ligament during a casual Sunday hang.