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Singapore Slurp: Government To Tax Mahjong Sessions Based On Tile-Slamming Intensity
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Government To Tax Mahjong Sessions Based On Tile-Slamming Intensity

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Chloe Ong
Monday 15th June 2026 @ 06:00 SST
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The Ministry of Home Affairs has officially classified the sound of shuffling Mahjong tiles as a weapon of mass distraction.

Authorities claim the rhythmic clacking of plastic tiles has reached decibel levels capable of shattering the eardrums of any nearby productive citizens.

New regulations require every household to install "Slam-O-Meters" to track the fiscal impact of aggressive winning streaks and excessive noise pollution.

"Wah lau, play game only also must pay tax, might as well go gallows straight away," remarked local gambling enthusiast, Uncle Teck.

"I just want to 'hu' one time big-big then can go sleep, why Gahmen so kaypoh one?" he shouted while violently rearranging his tile wall.

Medical professionals suggest that the intense wrist flicking required for a "zi mo" remains the only physical activity preventing total muscular atrophy in the heartlands.

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