Local kaypoh Izzy nearly soiled her Uniqlo knickers after spotting a boom lift ablaze in Sembawang.

The amateur paparazzo initially mistook the toxic black clouds for a massive communal smoke session, because in the North, air quality is a myth anyway.

Despite claiming she was "afraid of an explosion," the intrepid idiot stayed for ten minutes to ensure she got the perfect angle for her pathetic Stomp reward.

SCDF eventually arrived to extinguish the flames and everyone’s hopes for a spectacular fireball.

Experts confirm that filming a burning engine compartment is the only way some Singaporeans can feel a fucking spark in their hollow lives.