Following Australia’s radical move to tax property investors, the Singapore government has proposed a more "natural" method to narrow the intergenerational wealth gap: waiting for your parents to die.

A new white paper suggests that the most effective wealth redistribution happens during a well-timed wake at a void deck.

Authorities are encouraging Gen Z to stop whining about "affordability" and start focusing on their father’s rising cholesterol.

"Instead of complex tax reforms, we recommend the Double Char Kway Teow strategy," explained one high-ranking official.

"By feeding your Boomer parents extra lard, you can unlock their freehold assets within the next five to ten years."

Desperate youth are reportedly replacing their parents' blood pressure pills with mints to expedite the transfer of equity.

"I used to want policy changes," said one local 24-year-old while watching his father eat a third helping of crispy pork belly.

"Now, I just want a massive coronary and a four-bedroom condo."