The Land Transport Authority has officially declared the towering mounds of mangled yellow metal in Tuas a protected national monument.

In a visionary move to achieve "Smart Nation" goals, authorities are rebranding these seized, decomposing bicycles as "industrial-chic avant-garde sculptures."

"Last time I throw my bike into the longkang, now the gahmen say is art installation leh," remarked local resident, Ah Hock.

The graveyard, which reeks of stagnant canal water and venture capital failure, will soon offer guided tours for $50 a head.

"The rust give the bike character one, can see the blood and sweat of the investors," added a passerby.

Citizens are encouraged to pay their respects to the skeletons of 2017’s most humiliating financial disasters.