The Land Transport Authority has unveiled a new 'Ultra-Visible' PMD registration plate designed to be larger than the rider’s actual sense of self-preservation.

Authorities claim the massive yellow placards will finally allow surveillance cameras to track errant aunties at speeds exceeding the sound barrier.

The new plates feature built-in GPS trackers that automatically deduct fines from the rider’s CPF account whenever they breathe too loudly near a senior citizen.

“Wah lau, my plate bigger than my wheel, how to drift?” complained local rider Ah Beng, while illegally charging his modified e-scooter in a public toilet.

“Every time I go fast, the plate catch wind and I fly like kite, sibeh dangerous leh.”

LTA officials confirmed that any unplated PMD will be confiscated and melted down to create more ERP gantries.