The two missing girls were finally located after the Singapore Police Force reminded everyone that this island is basically a glorified CCTV camera with a food court attached.

While social media users celebrated their safety, the teenagers were reportedly devastated to find themselves back in a reality that involves assessment books and nagging parents instead of living their best industrial estate lives.

Sources say the 16-year-old was discovered mere minutes before she could successfully transform into a sentient cup of koi bubble tea, a common survival tactic for youth fleeing the national education system.

Influencers who helped find them are now pivoting to their next humanitarian crisis: finding a single Sinkie who isn't suffering from chronic burnout or the urge to jump off an ERP gantry.

The girls have been safely escorted back to their bedrooms to resume their scheduled programming of existential dread and TikTok dances until they turn 21 and realize there is truly no escape from this air-conditioned nightmare.