Minister for Everything Healthy and Orderly, Ong Ye Kung, has returned from China with a revolutionary governance strategy: a blend of “Order and Virtue” designed to ensure you never have an unauthorized private thought again.

During a forum in Hangzhou, the Minister noted that while Singaporeans are "cocooned" in their high-rise concrete boxes, they lack the "virtue" required to stop being total assholes to their neighbors.

"Order is the bedrock, but Virtue is the lube that makes the Order slide in easier," Ong reportedly told a room full of officials who definitely don't have a social credit score system.

Under this new framework, POFMA will no longer just be for "facts," but for "feelings."

If you fail to show sufficient "compassion" or "everyday acts of kindness" toward a civil servant, you will be served a Correction Notice directly to your soul.

Ong also praised the Central Provident Fund for "reinforcing the virtue of savings," proving that nothing inspires moral uprightness quite like the government legally kidnapping your salary until you're too old to spend it.

The Ministry later clarified that "Virtue" is now mandatory, and anyone found lacking it will be forcefully treated with "Order" until their morale improves.