The Singapore Armed Forces (SAF) has officially classified the inner padding of a Recruit’s helmet as a Grade-A chemical weapon.

After a five-day field camp in the sweltering humidity of Tekong, the fermented cocktail of scalp grease and stagnant sweat has reportedly achieved sentience.

“Walao, the smell so jialat it can make a freaking wild boar peng san instantly sia,” remarked Recruit Lim, whose headgear now radiates a visible green haze.

Defence scientists confirmed that the aroma of a three-month-old unwashed liner is more effective at area denial than traditional landmines.

“Don’t talk cock, this one is total biological warfare, you think what?” said one Encik while wearing a gas mask to conduct a standby bed.

The stench, which mimics a blend of rotting prawns and toxic flatulence, is now being bottled for export to international special forces.

Generals believe that simply throwing a used helmet into an enemy bunker is enough to cause immediate neurological collapse and permanent loss of taste.

“My helmet padding so pungent, it can probably peel the paint off a Leopard tank,” added another soldier while dry-heaving into his ground sheet.

MINDEF has assured the public that as long as recruits continue to be disgusting, Singapore’s sovereignty remains absolutely secure.