
SG Sinkie’s First Date Jitters Mistaken For Deadly Seizure
Local bachelor Lim Kopi was rushed to A&E after his first date jitters reached a terminal seismic intensity at a Dempsey Hill bistro.
Witnesses reported Lim’s hands were shaking so violently he accidentally whipped his credit card across the room, nearly decapitating a waiter.
The 32-year-old’s sweat production reportedly exceeded the annual output of the NEWater plant within twenty minutes of eye contact.
His date, Cheryl, remained unimpressed by his rhythmic spasms and frantic gasping.
“I thought he was having a stroke, but then I realized he’s just a typical socially-stunted Sinkie,” Cheryl remarked while scrolling through her Instagram.
“Actually I quite sian one, his hand shake until my truffle fries fly away, how to make baby like that?”
Medical experts confirmed Lim’s heart rate was high enough to power a small HDB block for a week.
The date ended when Lim’s nervous twitching caused him to accidentally PayLah! his entire life savings to a random scammer.
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