Local tech mogul Tan Ah Huat has shattered records by purchasing a $150 million Good Class Bungalow in Nassim Road solely to store his collection of silence.

The 25,000-square-foot estate features a lap pool filled with the tears of evicted tenants and a climate-controlled vault for his ego.

Mr. Tan’s former neighbour, Lim Kopi, expressed total bewilderment at the purchase.

“Wah lau, his garden can fit my whole BTO block and still got space for football field sia,” Mr. Lim remarked.

“Stay so big for what, every night play hide and seek with his shadow is it, or he scared we smell his money hor?”

Government officials praised the transaction as a sign of Singapore’s robust economy and the irrelevance of the shivering masses.

The property includes a soundproof wall designed to block the harrowing sounds of commoners debating the price of chicken rice.