Thousands of Singaporeans are flocking to Changi Beach to inhale premium kerosene fumes under the guise of "relaxing."

Nothing says "romance" like screaming into your partner’s ear while a Boeing 777 ruptures your eardrums at 140 decibels.

Local enthusiast Ah Beng claims the engine vibrations help him forget his soul-crushing corporate existence.

"Sibei shiok leh, see the plane fly away then I imagine I also inside, not stuck here like cockroach," he said.

Experts suggest this hobby is a coping mechanism for a population legally forbidden from having actual personalities.

Watching luckier people depart provides the exact resentment needed to survive another Monday.