The Management Corporation at ‘The Prestigious Elite Gardens’ has officially escalated its dispute resolution protocol by introducing a "zero-tolerance execution squad" for minor corridor infringements.

The council voted unanimously to bypass legal mediation in favour of immediate summary judgment for residents who leave wet umbrellas in the common hallway.

"Eh, I tell you ah, those people downstairs always put their smelly sneakers outside until the whole floor stink," said council chairman Tan Ah Teck, clutching a gold-plated clipboard.

"Talk also no use, better just take the parang and settle once and for all, then everyone will follow rules loh!"

New bylaws also include a $5,000 fine for breathing too loudly near the infinity pool, which is now reserved exclusively for the aesthetic enjoyment of the committee’s pedigreed poodles.

Property values are expected to surge as buyers seek militant-grade management to satisfy their deep-seated desire to control their neighbours' laundry habits.