The new Online Safety Commission has assured citizens that AI-generated nudes will be scrubbed from the internet with the efficiency of a peak-hour train breakdown.

Authorities confirmed that while AI can strip a person’s clothes in seconds, the government requires at least five working days to decide if the pixels are sufficiently offensive.

This strategic delay ensures that by the time a takedown order is issued, your entire secondary school alumni group has already critiqued your simulated physique.

Local creeps have praised the "nudifier" tools for finally making corporate LinkedIn profiles useful for something other than job hunting.

One official clarified that the five-day window allows the commission to thoroughly inspect every frame of the synthetic pornography to ensure no paperwork was skipped.

Victims are urged to stay calm while their fabricated bodies serve as the top trending topic on every local forum.