Singaporean couples are officially ditching midnight passion for sunrise sessions to maximise "KPI efficiency."

Experts suggest that performing in the morning allows citizens to arrive at the office with a glow that masks the stench of corporate submission.

By 5:15 AM, the average HDB flat vibrates with the sound of frantic friction intended to finish before the first bus arrives.

Local resident Tan Ah Kow claims that night-time activities are simply too draining after a twelve-hour shift of staring at spreadsheets.

"Night time very tired lah, better do fast-fast before the sun come out, then can go office early and look like I never sleep because I hardworking," Tan said.

Scientists warn that morning breath in a humid climate acts as a natural contraceptive for the weak-willed.

"Wah lau, his mouth smell like choke long-kang, but LL must do because tonight got OT," complained his partner, Mavis.

Ultimately, the state hopes this will boost the birth rate without compromising GDP growth.