A local financial visionary has achieved "financial freedom" by filming a clip in front of a rented Lamborghini he cannot afford to start.

The guru, whose wardrobe is on a three-month instalment plan, claims wealth involves screaming at teenagers to stop skipping his unskippable YouTube ads.

“Eh hello, don't skip! You want to stay poor is it?” the expert barked while wearing a suit that smelled of mothballs and lies.

“I tell you ah, I make ten thousand dollars while I go toilet one. You buy my $3,888 masterclass and you can be boss also, confirm plus chop!”

Authorities suggest the only thing compounding in this economy is the collective blood pressure of Singaporeans forced to endure these digital hallucinations.

The guru’s next seminar, ‘How to Monetise Your Stupidity’, is expected to sell out to those who still believe in financial magic.