In a move that puts the Singapore Civil Defence Force to shame, seventeen toddlers at a Eunos preschool have successfully synchronised their sphincters to create a local biological disaster.

School officials insist the mass-vomiting event was merely a "viral experience" rather than food poisoning, suggesting the children were simply participating in an immersive, liquid-based performance art piece.

While investigators sift through suspicious cheese sandwiches, the catering giant remains adamant their thousands of other meals didn't cause a single rectal tremor elsewhere.

“Liddat is normal what, one kid start then all follow,” noted one traumatised preschool educator.

“I tell them must share toys, but they go and share the backside fire instead, so direct one!”

Authorities are monitoring the situation to ensure no more brown fountains erupt before nap time.