TODAY'S

SLURP STATS:

🟒READING NOW
8,962
πŸ”SHARES TODAY
1,323
❀️LIKES TODAY
3,616
Singapore Slurp: Sinkies Abandon Families To Watch Seven Men Swim In Korea
singapore news

Sinkies Abandon Families To Watch Seven Men Swim In Korea

πŸ§”πŸ»β€β™‚οΈ
David Cheong
Thursday 19th March 2026 @ 18:02 SST
πŸ€ͺ867

K-pop titans BTS have released a teaser for their new single "Swim," prompting thousands of Singaporeans to immediately resign from their jobs and leave their toddlers at the supermarket.

The 26-second clip of seven men standing on a boat reportedly contains more emotional depth than the average Singaporean’s thirty-year marriage.

Local fans are currently flooding Incheon Airport, happy to endure four-hour immigration queues just to inhale the same recycled oxygen as their idols.

One fanatical office worker said: "Wife ask me why I take two weeks leave, I say stop talking because Jimin is on a ship and my soul is also on the ship lah!"

An eyewitness confirmed seeing a woman sell her wedding ring for a flight, screaming: "Real life is very boring one, I rather go Korea and wait for the drone show until I peng san!"

Experts suggest the "Arirang" album is the only thing preventing a national mental breakdown among the local population.

This satire is based on a real news story.

πŸ’¬VENT ZONE(0 comments)

Loading comments...

SUBSCRIBE TO OUR LIES

Get 100% organic, locally-sourced misinformation delivered daily.

Singapore SlurpSingapore ComedySingapore Satire