Singaporean property speculators have reached a new level of derangement by flipping decrepit industrial units as if they were high-end Swiss watches.

With residential cooling measures biting hard, the nation’s collective greed has migrated into the glamorous world of oil-stained concrete and toxic chemical runoff.

“This B2 workshop got ‘rustic legacy’ vibes and smells like pure 100% profit, confirm plus chop,” remarked property agent Gary Teo, while gesturing towards a pile of rusted scrap metal.

“One day it’s a cockroach-infested lathe factory, next day it’s a ‘strategic logistics node’ worth five million dollars to some blur sotong,” Gary added.

Analysts predict that a windowless, grease-slicked cubicle in an Ubi basement will soon be marketed as a ‘sovereign wealth storage facility’ for the insanely wealthy.

“Siao liao, as long as got another sucker to buy, I flip until the building collapse also can,” boasted a local investor who hasn’t stepped foot in Tuas since 1994.