Some old man in Rome warned that the world is growing numb to war, which Singaporeans immediately celebrated as a national achievement.

Local residents confirmed they have reached a state of total emotional paralysis where a drone strike is less traumatic than a 10-cent hike in Kopi-O prices.

"I'm not numb, I'm just too busy grinding for a BTO that won't be ready until 2035," one exhausted auditor explained while scrolling past photos of charred corpses.

National experts say this "strategic apathy" is a vital survival skill for anyone living in a country where even the air is taxed.

Most citizens agreed they would only start caring about global conflict if the missiles actually hit a Shopee sorting facility.