Donald Trump has successfully averted World War III by letting Xi Jinping whisper sweet nothings while strolling through a high-security flower bed.

The US President confirmed that Taiwan should stop being so "clinging" and learn to enjoy the smell of roses instead of missiles.

Trump noted that Xi is a "great guy" with very impressive old trees, which is a fair trade for the sovereignty of 23 million people.

Singaporean pragmatists praised the move, noting that a Boeing jet deal is much better for the local stock market than a radioactive winter.

The billionaire leader warned Taiwan that if they try to "go independent," he will block their number and let Xi handle the island’s "foreclosure."

Diplomatic experts say this "strategic stability" involves two geriatric men bonding over plants while selling out an entire country for some free flower seeds.