The peregrine falcon fledgling’s career in finance ended abruptly when it realized UOB’s "open-door policy" doesn't apply to those without a fucking employee lanyard.

Witnesses claim the bird was being harassed by a mob of low-SES crows before it decided to use the lobby glass as a high-speed exit from life.

The collision was reportedly so loud that three investment bankers nearby almost dropped their $18 salads.

NParks researchers are currently verifying if the bird was simply trying to flee the soul-crushing atmosphere of the CBD.

Building management has since praised the window’s structural integrity for successfully repelling a biological projectile with zero corporate clearance.

Remaining siblings have been advised that "failing to fledge" is still better than "fucking dying" on a UOB rug.